adult sms - Funny sms

When im dead and in my grave,
no more pussy i will crave.
And apon my headstone will be seen,
here liies the bones of a fucking machine.

Peter,
Peter,
Pumpkin eater,
had a wife & liked to beat her,
smacked her twice around da head,
F**ked her arse & went 2 bed!

I want triplets,
You want twins,
Lets get in bed and see who wins!

Life is like a dick!
When it's hard Fuck it!

Zippy & Bungle,
went 2 da jungle havin sum marvelous fun,
Zippy got silly,
popped out his willy & stuck it up Bungles bum!

It's a hard life being a penis,
you have a head with no brain,
one eye that's blind,
2 neighbours that are nuts,
the others an arsehole & your best mates a cunt

Q)wot do u get wiv nuts on ur wall?
A)walnuts
Q)wot do u get wiv nuts on ur chest?
A)chestnuts
Q)wot do u get wiv nuts on ur chin?
A)a mouth full of cock!