sms jokes - Funny sms

Ek totle ko interview mein chaar words bolne they:
Institute, Aptitude, Magnitude, Subtitute

Totla bola: “In ki chut, Aap ki chut, Maa ki chut aur Sab ki chut”

Boy To His Friend:
Yaar Main Apni Girl Friend Ko Birthday Kya Gift Doon?
Friend:
Kaisi Dikhti Hai?
Boy:
Bohat Khubsurat

Friend:
Aisa Karoo Oss Ko Mera Mobile Number Dey Doo…

Bush ne bivi ko surprise
dene k lie Naqli darhi monchain laga
k rat ko chupke se bister men so gaya.

adhi rat ko bivi ki ankh khuli to us k mun
per hath phera or khushi se ucchal
kar boli USAMA tum aaj phir aa gaye?

A Couple- Before marriage Mad for each other, After marriage Made for each other, In future Mad because of each other…..!!!

Tujhe utha ke lon ya bitha ke lon
karon andhera ya balb jala ke lon
ya tujhe khada karon phir teri jhuka ke lon
ab to hi bata ke main tere tasver kaise lon

A 90 yr old man started making love with his 85 yr wife, he started sucking her breats and after few seconds the man expired, GUESS WHY?
Autoposy Report : death due to expired milk.